Overdose Delusion

There's always too much information to process: a brain overloaded with nightmarish and vile memories, always removing past from where it belongs and placing it in places like under my bed and at the back of my ear. There's too much screaming scattered inside and outside my head.

Anxiety release

Poeple keep asking me why do I clean my room so often and why do I organise it so neatly. The truth that no one knows, nor thought about, is that I organise my room hoping that some day I'll be able to organise my life just as well.


Even knowing I won't.

First you'll swallow it to ease your pain. With time, you'll swallow it just to begin the day.

Give me a lie to stitch the ever itching wound.

Detaching and throwing old things away

hoping that this way

the old feeling of love

(my archaic love for him) 

will as well be thrown away.

Age 13 - "Things were fine, then I woke up." 

 Age 15 - "Things were awful even in my sleep." 

Age 18 - "I no longer sleep, afraid of nightmares."